1 Next Chapter Please

Shock was indeed an understatement.
Human I am. I won't pretend that everything's fine. I'll cry a tear or two, but after that, I know I'll be better and far stronger. No use to crying over spilt milk.
We are all matured enough to face another day.
And to move forward to a more colorful horizon.

Whatever is in store for me, que sera sera...

0 Try

Try honesty.
Really.
It ain't a bad thing.

0 Gonna Catch Yah

After waiting for weeks and tons of good reviews from family and friends, I decided to give in...

See yah later, alligator!

0 Bull's Eye

So me. Exactly. Thanks Amber!

1 Pluma

Minsan parang ayaw ko ng sumulat.
Bakit?
Dahil parang hindi ko rin naman makuha kung anong gusto nila
At alam ko rin namang
Markado na ako.
Na hindi ako sing-galing tulad nila.

Sabi ng isang kaibigan, wag daw mag-alinlangan
Dahil ang antas ng talino ay iba-iba
At tiyak mapapanglaw ang may lalang
Pag ang talento'y di pinagyaman.

1 Onion Layers

According to the Social Penetration Theory, getting to know a person and starting to build rapport is rapid at the start but it becomes slower when one starts getting deeper and already nearing the inner core of the other person, which could range from his deep dark secrets, emotions and deep-seated values. Just like an onion, it gets tightly packed on the middle. Getting to the core means dealing with the depth and breadth of the person, which can be really touchy.

There is also a point when one depenetrates in a relationship, let's say something bad happens and you decided to start staying away from the person. You get to move away from his inner to outer core little by little until such time you become plain old acquaintances.

Lately, it seems like this whole theory is getting on me, on the reverse side though.

Little by little, am starting to move inch by inch away to most people. Or so I think.

Or maybe the circumstances lead me to this feeling and that it is not I who is moving away but them.

And during this times, I abhor studying communication theories... :(

0 The Gamble

The matters of my heart has become a hot topic for most of my gal pals from different circles over the past couple of weeks. Nobody's betting on who or what, however, they are unanimously rooting for a particular person, telling me that if the guy makes me darn happy then I should go for it.

One friend even compared this heart game into a card game, she explained to me all her cards, all her options. She even said something about her prayers. However, at the end of the day, she reiterated that she won't gamble me that easy. That she, along with another circle of gal pals, will hate to see me crying a river again. She also cleared that she ain't the one involved here and the decision will still come from yours truly.

Yes girls, I certainly agree. All your options were so damn pleasant to the ears. But still, it is anybody's ballgame. And we don't even know how is it going on his end. I can only wonder and hope and pray. However, I believe that if God would allow it, then I can say that yes, there truly are miracles.

Que sera sera...

0 Getting Hitched

Two years ago, I met this wonderful lass. Lil did we know that we would become really good friends. To my surprise, she woke me with her text message last August 8, informing me, that yes, as the title of this post goes she's getting hitched August 15.

Initial Reaction: Dropped jaw, really erratic heartbeat and a short "EWAN" sms.

Lemme share the scenario. About a month ago, she asked if I could help her arrange her "cousin's" wedding. The dutiful friend that I am agreed. I emailed her notes, texted her reminders and gave her a call whenever she has queries. Out of the blue, I told her in one of our conversations, "If I know, this is your wedding that we are preparing..." Zoom in to August 8, yes the running joke boomeranged on me. It was her wedding all along. Christ!

She even misinterpreted my reaction that I wasn't happy for her. It ain't true. You may have told me the best and the worst times of your relationship but it does not give me the right to be unhappy. On the contrary, I am truly happy.

I being her dutiful friend, agreed to be her wedding coordinator/emcee.

Fast track to August 14. Note to self , not to sleep beside the bride the night before her wedding. You won't get a good night sleep. Seriously. ;)

August 15. The ceremony went the way the groom and the bride wanted it to be. And am so happy to be able to contribute and make their dream come true. A bonus was that though it was raining cats and dogs outside, it was raining men at the venue. Handsome guys in their own rights. And I was able to meet fun people who were also willing to make the event fun as well.

Funny part of the wedding was when the groom asked me to sleep with them at their condo unit. I politely said no. What the hell am I suppose to do there? Judge? Referee? Or scorer perhaps? You decide...

To the newlyweds, need I say more? I have already written those on the dedication notebook.

Oh wait, looking forward to the pictures though... And to my future God child... :)

1 Inferior

How to explain being little?
Is it
Being vertically challenged?
Or
having less cerebral prowess perhaps.

How do you gauge greatness?
superiority?
intelligence?

And when one feels inferior
who is to blame?
is it
himself?
the superior ones?
or
the standards?

1 Hey You

Hey you, yes you...
I wanna let you into what I feel
The nostalgia you bring during my solitude
A bliss that turned into longing

Hey you, yes you...
I crumble, I stumble
I may not look so
But God knows I do...

Hey you, yes you
In a line I put these verses
Plain and simple
I miss you.

0 Dreaming of a White Graduation

Now I realize, I love being in school and challenging my mind in studying people and how the society walk/talk/react.

What was more amazing was when my undergrad thesis was passed around the class by our professor as an example. Though I was so happy to see how they scan through the pages and felt so proud about my work, I also felt pressure...pressure on the underlying, unexpressed, expectations. In a few weeks time, I am going to face the same people who took a glimpse of my sample work and answer all the nerve-racking questions as they scrutinize my paper.

Some classmates jokingly stated they wanna drop already. Research writing ain't a piece of cake really. It just takes time and deserve utmost attention, or lemme say dedication.

I know one day, am gonna march that stage wearing that white thingamaging around my neck (sorry, dunno the term for that color-coded cloth you put above your toga, hehehe!)

But for now, back to reality, starting to work my ass again...

Till then...

0 The Trouble with Economics

Twas a warm Sunday when my younger brother and I decided to go out to splurge moolah and make stores richer (we haven't done that for months now). He was contemplating whether or not to buy a DQ or a cup of frappuccino since, upon his observation, a cup of Blizzard at Trinoma costs more that how it used to in other branches. And so the conversation goes:

Scenario: Headng to All Flip Flops, he was walking ahead of me.

KidBro: Bakit ganun, sa DQ Araneta Center, cheaper yung Blizzard tapos mas malaki yung size, bat dito, same price smaller size?
Me: Really? Well ganun talaga, recession eh, lahat na halos nagmahal.

He slowly looks at his back, caught my eye and said

KidBro: Oo nga ate eh. Ikaw na lang ang hindi nagmamahal.

And there I was, standing and staring at him. The only thing I was able to utter was a sarcastic "Salamat ha."

So much for knowing the world's global recession issue.

0 Going Vintage

1972 Chevrolet Chevelle Super Sport



The 1966 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray (C2)



The 1957 Chevrolet Bel Air Convertible

The 1966 Mercedes Benz W133

Some kewl rides displayed at SM The Block last June 21.
Pimp my vintage baby!

0 Still Your Little Girl

I thought I was strong, but hell I long for that one person who has taught me to laugh despite broke and disabled...my pappy. And am missing him so darn badly I ended up crying.

0 Zane+Moi= Out of the Blue Trips

Twas the 23rd of May, after the tedious campaign, Zane and I decided to reward ourselves. At around 6 p.m., we are aboard a bus at Cubao to Tagaytay. Seiously, we aint have a clear plan of what we wanna do, we just wanna go there. Three hours later, we are both beaming as we reached Tagaytay rotonda. Since everything was pretty unplanned and we are both "newbies" in the area (we have been to Tagaytay but this was our first time to come there on commute), I felt kinda lost seeing only colorful lamposts. After a short prayer asking for guidance so as not to be lost, I saw the sign...it aint the shinning star of Bethlehem but the distinct green logo of Starbucks. Without second thoughts we went down the bus and explored the lights and sights of Tagaytay by night.

Let our photographs tell the rest of our unplanned trip




bus ride to Tagaytay: Fare: 121 bucks



At Leslie's entrance...boy we're hungry not only with food but with photos to treasure the night




Zane's contemplating what to have for dinner (for sure there'd be no more chocolate cupcakes...hehehe!)






Dinner is served!

Menu: Since we are on a tight budget, we opt for simple yet delectable Sinigang na Tanigue. Yummy!




After feasting...Zane acted as a fairy godmother and granted my long term dream... coffee @ Starbucks Tagaytay

0 To The Light

Whether it was second childhood or a simple craving that you wanted a ginormous pizza or a steaming bowl of Chinese noodles, don't worry 'coz twas cute.

The glow in your eyes when we were in your so-called playground of endless silvers and chinas, and found joy by just merely looking at them was indeed precious.

The way you laugh and cheer whenever we beat the computer opponent in Family Feud sounds really melodic.

If only I could capture and preserve these moments, I would.

You are cool and smart
Brave and loving
Patient, patient, patient

What more can I ask?

For the person who loves me and kid bro unconditionally

Beyond our tantrums
our hardheadedness
No matter how fat or ugly we feel, still you see us as your beautiful lil angels.

To you our light, a day of delight.

I love you.

0 Just so you know

It ain't that easy...really.
For now
Just let me be.

0 Silver

It began today...25 years ago
The start of an ardor that lead me here

It may have ended on a sad note
Still I need to be grateful

Thy bond may have been broken
Six-feet under the other half went

To you I offer who I am now
You made me whole, my existence complete

I love you.

0 And so The Script kinda read my thoughts

It's been a while since the two of us talked
About a week since the day that you walked
Knowing things would never be the same
With your empty heart and mine full of pain

So explain to me how it came to this
Take it back to the night we kissed
It was Dublin city on a Friday night
With vodkas and coke, I was getting insomniac

We were sitting with our backs against the world
Saying things that we thought but never heard
Oh, who would've thought it would end up like this

But everything we talked about is gone
And the only chance we have of moving on
Was trying to take it back before it all went wrong

Before the worst, before we met
Before our hearts decided it?s time to love again
Before too late, before too long
Let's try and take it back before it all went wrong

0 Bangin

Ako.
Nalaglag.
Bangin.
Malalim.
Madilim.
Sumisigaw.
Tulong.
Liwanag.
Ga-hibla.
Nababanaag.
Umaahon.
Pilit.
Bato.
Kinakapitan.
Dahan-dahan.
Uusad.
Ngunit.
Unti-unti.
Bumubulusok.
Pabalik.
Tumatagal.
Lumalalim.
Ako.
Nananatili.
Nahihirapan.
Naghihintay.
Sumisigaw.
Umiiyak.
Pag-asa.
Pilit.
Binaabanaag.
Nagbabakasakali.
Gigising.
Umaga.
Nakaahon.
Nakausad.
Bangin.
Bangungot.
Ako.
Magpapaalam.